Soul Time

The best part of my career is ...
My annual leave...


Have a Soulful time everyone...

Book Heaven

So many books so little time.

A list of new books for this month!

Here is a rundown of the books waiting in line:

1. The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck
   
2. Angels and Demons by Dan Brown
   
3. The Juror by John Grisham
   
4. Harry Potter (the final book)
   

Can't wait to start losing myself in a good book!

Thanks Gardens of Sand for inspirig me to check out my list of books!

Love,

Soul

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday Khalooooood...

(belated on the blog but not belated in reality!)

You are now officially 17 years old...

I love you my tweet wittle brother!

On blogging and the world around me

I've been wondering lately about my blog...

What do I really want to say to the world?

Where is this going?

Should I just delete the blog with one simple click of a mouse?

Can I make a difference in the word, even if in the slightest of chances, to make someone realize the world can be a better place. Maybe not, I'm not that significant, nor my opinions, nor my talents, nor my communications abilities, not that exhilarating, not that breathtaking.

So what should this blog say?

Is it a parenting blog?

Is it a blog of special concerns?

Is it a political views blog?

Is it a feminist blog?

Is it a constuction project blog?

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I've been wondering about life as well?

What do I want from life?

Where am I going? Where will I be 10 years from now?

Do I continue to pursue a successful career? or do I want to focus on my family? Can I make that choice?

Its sickening sometimes, to have to go on, or to even have these thoughts. Thoughts of my days becoming cumbersome, rather than looking forward to another day...

I've been feeling depessed, these past few days...

Its tough to balance parenting, a demanding career, construction project, life, and family, and extended family, and courtesies, and on and on and on.... Its suffocating sometimes...

But I have to move on..

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Well... after some musing I guess this blog is anything I want it to be,

Any thoughts, fustrations, triumphs, flops, disappointments, celebrations can be spilled out here, that is if I have the chance...

So here's to this blog...

May it be the vent of all emotions that make me human...

Peace,

SoulSearch...

Cooking 101

Ther's something very therapuetic about cooking... It just lifts your soul and helps you give a feel good factor that I always need as soon as I step home from work. That's exactly what I do, everyday, I get home at around 4.30pm (on good days) and speed into my kitchen to prepare a good hearty meal for my kids lunch the next day! Its hard being a working mother. I end up cooking the following meals:

1. dinner of that evening

2. Breakfast of the next day (inlcudes packin my kids snack for school and my own for work)

3. Lunch for the next day (kids come home way before I do)-(and they need a proper meal)

So I'm always on the lookout for healthy, quick meals to prepare in an hour or two.

Love to cook...I guess I take after my dad who is a chef!!! But surprisingly, never tried anything before I had my own kitchen...

Can't wait to move in to my new house where I will have so much more space to cook up good meal for the kids everyday!!!

Love,

SoulSearch

Project: Dream Home

Its been exactly a year since we started building our dream home. In Bahrain, owning your home has always been a worry plaguing the minds of the people. My husband and I were lucky enough as my late father-in-law had a land from ages ago and gave it to his son, who had taken care of his parents for a very long time. Being the youngest of 8 children, his parents had reached retirement age when he first started working. So he paid the rent, he paid the bills and took care of everything for them. I'm really proud of him for that and I hope his kids will do the same.

He had always dreamed of building a home for himself and his parents, having lived in a rented apartment all their lives. When we started preparing the drawings for the house, his father passed away and gave him the land, which was all they had.

The land is about 70x60 foot. I can't say in numbers how much of that was used for the actual construction but the compound is around 2 meters wide in the front and around 1 meter on the sides and in the back.

We have two rooms downstairs from my ma-in-law, plus a bathroom, a small kitchenette and a separate entry door for her. We have 2 living rooms downstairs and a dining room plus a master kitchen. I wanted to have a connecting window between the two kitchens but the idea came too late as the wiring was already done.

What I really like is the room that we built on top of the garage. You take one flight of the main staircase and enter this room, which my husband calls the Function Hall. He wants to get a huge LCD TV with speakers in the wall and make it the main entertainment room!! We love it. Its also got a small balcony and from the outside it shows as a room between the two floors.

Upstairs, we have 4 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms. A Laundry room and a storage room on the 3rd floor. All the tiling is completed. My daughter's bathroom is pink with a hearts border and my sons bathroom is white and green with rainbow borders! They love it but I think they still don't understand that this is the place we're going to move in to inshallah.

Now that we have finished the first stage of construction, Iwanted to take a step back and see how work has progressed, and what we need to do to complete our dream home.

We started back in November 2006, (so its now been a year) after taking a joint loan from the MInistry of Housing, which amounts to BD 40,000 max, we needed to take 2 other loans from the bank. We also need to take an additional loan to be able to go through the finishing and furnishing of the house.

We handed over the project to a contractor who charged us around BD 45,000 for the skeleton of the house. That was when we were laid back and relaxed. The contractor did everything and we just supervised. But after the initial stage is completed, we needed to follow up on every little detail from door knobs to light bulbs.

The kitchen is still in the back of or minds, we want to first finish all the bathrooms and gypsum work and then focus on the kitchen and its layout. We've already seen a kitchen we love and put a downpayment for it.

The gypsum boards have been put up, the walls now have primer on them. But thanks to Balexco, we still don't have windows. We had chosen chocolate brown aluminum for the window frames and some of the doors. But they decided in the last minute that our project was too small and so cancelled the order. We are now stuck. I'm sure everything will work out, we just need to find someone who has stock or something.

So the initial cost of the house came up to around BD 71,000. We still need an additional BD10,000 to be able to move in.

So until we are able to finance the project we continue to work with what we have.

I'm happy with the whole house, though I never expected it to be the way it is now. On paper, things are totally different!

Can't wait to move in...

Peace,

SoulSearch

Home Sweet Home...Update

Everyday, our home looks more real. Its now taking shape and at this stage we're assuming we need 4 months to go until all is done and we can move in.

Construction is now at the gypsum stage, we now have ceilings :D

A garage door :D

We now need to figure out the exact amount of spotlights and downlights. Next comes the Aluminum for the windows...

Its amazing to see the progress of contruction. Can't wait to start painting, and cleaning, and arranging furniture!

Makes me grateful everyday. :D

Peace,

SoulSearch

What makes life worthwile...

Tea with Milk, and the floating smell of cardamom, in front of the TV, on a Tuesday morning.

SoulSearching …

Hey world,

It's been a hectic couple of months of my life but it's been great. I've reached a turning point in my life, got a great opportunity and took every inch of it, and here I am, in a new job, finalizing construction of my new home, and my son is now in school/nursery everyday! And I am thankful.

I'm grateful for everything that I have in my life, although my schedule is full to the brim, but my kids are happy and healthy and my life is in the direction I need it to be…

I've promised a few images of the house, I don't have a very good one on me now, but I promise to take better images soon, just to show the stages at which construction has reached. It's amazing to see the guys putting up the ceilings and drilling holes in the upstairs floors to make way for the wiring and the lights. The house looks more real now. I feel like going up to them and shaking their hands and to thank them every day!!!

Does anyone have any suggestions on whether we should install ceiling fans in the bedrooms? That's something we need to resolve and argue about it every single day. I'm not sure… People, you know what the weather is like in Bahrain, suggestions anyone? Maybe I should start a poll or something, vote for or against ceiling fans!

Check out our new door! I love it… it looks like it's made of wood but it's actually wrought iron! Isn't that lovely!!!

I went to Dubai last month and enjoyed 5 fabulous days in the city that never stops being the first and the fastest in eveything! It's amazing to see the pace at which this city is rising; I was flabbergasted at the huge skyscraping buildings in Bar Dubai, near Ibn Batuta Mall, they looked unreal! I thought they were cardboard signs or something, the snow city in the Mall of the Emirates was amazing, it reminded me of Lebanon's beautiful mountains, but not nearly as breathtaking. But I absolutely loved Dubai minus the ugly snaking queue waiting for a taxi!

That's it for now, I hope I can keep blogging, as much as circumstances permit!

Love and Peace to the world…

SoulSearch J

Back to Blog

HIIIIIIIIIII

my dear blog...

missed the blogosphere completely...& utterly...& totally...

I shall be back soooooon.... to write about my life, my worries, my concerns, my children, their school, my new job, my new house, and which stage of construction it is now, (pictures too!!!) my new outlook on life... it may not all be good but not all of it bad, or sad or ugly... There should be alot of positivity... :)

As the words of the legendary Bob Marley ring in my ear: "Cause every little thing is gonna be alright now"...

Love

SoulSearch...

On Books & Reading

I treated myself to the final Harry Potter book. I have devoured the previous 6 Harry Potters and loved every page, line and dot!

Can't wait to start it...

... I'm currently reading Patricia Cornwell's Blow Fly! A bit too gruesome for me, but I like the mystery element!! ...

On being human...

I've been good
I've been bad,
I've been happy,
I've been down,
I've made mistakes,
I've been a winner,
Cried my eyes out,
Laughed till I was in stiches,
I've had my share of luck,
Been very unfortunate sometimes,
I've been free,
I've been trapped,

I've loved,
and hated...

and lived ...

and that's what makes us human...

In the Corporate World...

It never ceases to amaze me, the way people's attitudes change when promised better positions or more money...

Peace,

SoulSearch

Labor Rights

Have you heard of the phrase: "A slave to the job", well, that's how I feel right now. I'm at a point where I have had it with work. I feel I have come to a breaking point, where I'm seriously thinking of making greeting cards for a living or something kinky like that!

People rant and rave about Labor Rights, what about Children's Rights, when a mother works every single day from 8am to 5pm and by the time she gets home its 5.30 or 5.45pm, her kids are getting ready to call it a day. What do I say to my 2 year-old son, who asks me why I leave him every single day? What do I say to my daughter when she tells me she wants to color a rainbow with her? Do I tell them I'm beat, my mind is clouded with all the tasks and responsibilities that I have at work? Would they understand that I'm doing all this for them, so I would never have to compromise their education, their lives, etc...

I miss my kids, my life is passing by and I'm in the office worrying about other trivialities while I'm missing out on wonderful moments with my children. I love you A & S.

Love,

SoulSearch, the mother!

Its me, Its music

Music does something to my soul. It takes me away from my troubles, my sorrow, my pain. Music is a treasure. I love music.

As the weight of the world gets heavier and heavier on my shoulders, my only valve, is my 15 or 20 minutes a day in my car, where I'm by myself, I just listen to all the music I want, starting from my favorite rockers - Nickleback - to Annie Lenox - to any 80s music I can put my hands on.

I want to sleep, to feel free, to run like the wind, to be happy.

Peace,

SoulSearch

My Knefe Recipe

There's nothing like a taste of Lebanon every once in a while, and no other desert is more representative of Lebanese cuisine as Kunafeh, or Knefe as the Lebanese say it. To those who asked for my special Knefe recipe, well, here it is, I hope you enjoy it :)

Ingredients:
The Knefe dough (from supermarkets) (separated as best you can)
2 cups of sweetened milk or 1 can of sweetened condensed milk
1/2 a cup of cornflour
1 cup of room-temperature water
5 tbs of Ghee

For the sugar syrup:

2 cups of sugar
1 cup water
a squeeze of lemon
2 tsp of orange blossom water (mai zaher)

First, you will need to separate the kunafa dough and place it in pyrex pan or a non-stick pan.
Separately in a small saucepan add the milk (whichever you choose) and add the cornflour, stirring constantly, add the water and continue to stir until the mixture is firm and boiling.
This will be your cream between the two layers of the Knefe.
Then sprinkle some ghee (or butter) over the dough, spread the cream over it and add another layer of dough on top of the cream. sprinkle more ghee over your knefe and place it in the oven for 30 to 35 minutes or until it is slightly golden.

For the syrup:

Place the 2 cups of sugar and one cup of water in another saucepan. Bring to the boil. Allow to cool slightly then add a squeeze of lemon juice and some orange blossom water (mai zaher) and pour over the hot Knefe.

For Decoration: Sprinkle some ground pistachio in any pattern you like!

And Voila! you are almost a Lebanese chef.

If any one tries my recipe, be sure to come back and tell us about the taste ;)

Peace,
SoulSearch

Weekend Desert

Because my dad is a chef and specialized in Lebanese cuisine, I've always taken it for granted that we have tabouleh, stuffed vine leaves, chicken fata for lunch, and kunafah, baqlawa, and basboosa for desert.

However, I went into a lebanese cooking frenzy in the past few months, and decided to cook all things Lebanese, that have always been there on the table but very difficult to attempt cooking.

I made tabouleh the other day, and the last weekend I made Kunafah. My dad was all smiles, proud of his offspring, at her first attempt at real Kunafah. And it was a major hit, my husband loved it, my brothers downed it, my cousin almost finished it, and of course my dad and mom were like proud parents at their eldest child's graduation.

I'll leave you with my Kunafah!

p.s. the little bite on the side was Amoona. She couldn't resist but take a bite!! =)

Reading Treat

Every night, I get to go somewhere, to follow a story so tremendously amazing and heartbreaking, that I am having trouble sleeping. My mom lent me this book the other day and urged me to read it. It was in Arabic so I was kind of finding it cumbersome. But then I decided to stop being silly and decided to start reading more Arabic novels in order to strengthen my dwindling Arabic skills.

But once I started, I couldn't stop.

As much as the story is amazing, it sends shivers down my spine.

Its called "The Prisoner" (in Arabic) by Malika OuFakir and Michelle Fitoussi. I found an English version of the book on Amazon. com called "Stolen Lives: Twenty Years in a Desert Jail" which was also listed in Oprah's Book Club.

It scares me to read the devestation that happened to this poor family, inflicted upon them by a sel-centered king who has no value for human life. It scares me to know that this has happened in the Arab World, and it scares me even more to think of the other untold stories.

The story is told by Malika, the daughter of a Moroccan General back in the 1970s. Malika was adopted by the King Hassan II and went to live with his siter Lila Mina in a lavish palace where she spent all of her childhood. Although she lived extravagantly, she missed out on her life with her real family. Its heart-wrenching to read the worries from a child's point of view. Her parents were helpless because what the King wants, the King gets.

*Spoiler ahead*

Later on, her father stages a coup against Hassan the Second and is executed on the spot, leaving behind his family who get to experience a rainbow of torture in prison. Her mother, her 3 sisters and 2 brothers, one of them only 2 years old, get whisked away to a Desert prison where they spend 20 years of their lives behind prison gates.

They go through hell, their lives stolen by an unruly, narcasistic King who did not care about the least of any himan rights. Imagine a child who has never seen a newspaper, a car, or the asphalt of the road. They feed on the grass that grows near the prison bars, since they don't get enough food supplies. They get separated into 4 prison cells and they spend 11 years of their lives in separate cells never seeing each other. The mother with Abdulatif, her youngest, Malika with her 3 sisters, and the eldest brother Ra'ouf is locked up in a separate cell. the psychological torture that they go through is heartbreakingly inhuman. They are so close yet so far away. The 2-year-old boy is 22 by the time they escape, having never set eyes on a toy or on a real football field. He grows to love football from the radio that they have to hide so elaborately.

But they device an intricate plan to dig a 5-meter hole to freedom, they have to get past the guards outside, the stray dogs in the desert and they have to get to the city to reach the French Embassy where they plan to take political asylum.

And that's where I reached last night!

I want to go back home as soon as possible, get the kids to bed so I can continue my reading. Will keep you posted on the events of the story when I'm done.

A true page-turner, the book is an excellent read, and an invaluable insight into the injustices that take place behind the media frenzy and the galmor and the politics.

Its a jungle out there.

Peace,

SoulSearch

Crazy Week

Its been a crazy week. I've been as busy as a bee running around doing everything and being everything at the same time.

I turned 29 on Monday. Thanks Naz, Mool, and the rest of the gang for a wonderful lunch and coffee. The shawl is beautiful, the perfume confiscated by hubby =)

Tuesday was a another day of errands, I was at the clinic in the morning for a medical check-up, (upset stomach).

Running around all hardware stores for bathroom tiles for our dream home! Love the stuff at Marmara, Sitra Highway. Prices were surprisingly reasonable and we are very close to finalizing all 7 bathrooms! Yey =)

Another day of going around, this time it was for kitchens. W e visited a few kitchen places. We are now in a dilemma. Should we go for a wooden or an aluminum kitchen? I want to go for the Alu choice, while hubby is thinking of going for the wooden (I am suspecting!)

I'm glad its Thursday. Tomorrow is Friday and I'm hoping I can stay at home and be a bum. Do nothing. But I will have to wake up early tomorrow, play with the kids and give them all the love, time and attention I can. I miss them and feel infinitely guilty for being so busy all week. The only consolation is: I do all of this for them. The house, the job, the life all revolves around them. You would only understand if you were a parent. I guess at the end of the day, your kids are the priority. Little human beings who totally depende on you for their lives. How could you even think of turning your back. You wouldn't.

Peace,
SoulSearch

A World of Hopelessness

Hope for Life. When I started this blog, I hoped I could write about my concerns as an Arab citizen living in the Arab world.
But today, I feel I have reached a dead end. Killing, wars, conflicts, suicide bombings, in many parts of the Arab world; is this the spiral to our destruction?

So many questions on my mind; is it our fault? or governments'? our leaders? our inaction? our slumber?

Or is it fate, is it our destiny to watch people around us die for no reason.

Iraq is one fire,
Palestine is still occupied,
Lebanon is a political time bomb,
Morocco is shook by a bloody attack,
Algeria follows...

Who's next? Is it Al-Qaeda? Is it Israel (very conspiracy theory, I know)? Is it the US?
Does Al-Qaeda even exist? or is it just a fabrication of the media by a superpower who created this bearded monster extremist monster to blame all the BS going on in the world, for economic and political gains?

Where are we going? What is happening? Do we just go on living our lives? Do we just work, and take aour children to school? and go have lunch somewhere? and then come home?
What about the destruction around us? What about the future? What about progress?

Is this normal? Is anyone out there?

Peace,
SoulSearch